Santa using cloud computing on a tablet

Santa Would Be Even More Productive with Cloud Computing

DISCLAIMER: Let it be known that this is not an attempt to criticize Kris Kringle in any way. It is simply an observation on how the jolly old elf could upgrade his current systems, processes, and documentation to a more modern approach. We reinforce this a.) to ensure Santa knows we appreciate him and all his efforts, and b.) to avoid the possibility of receiving coal in our stockings this Christmas.

Now that THAT’S out of the way, we do feel that Santa could greatly benefit from migrating to Cloud computing to improve his operations. Granted, his existing system has worked for hundreds of years, but efficiency always includes improvements, right? So, let’s have a look:

More Room at the North Pole

To keep records of inventory for gifts for each and every good little girl and boy on the planet – much less historic records of the same over years past – would require a massive amount of storage space. As such, Santa likely has a huge space for his onsite servers at the North Pole. By migrating to Cloud computing, Santa could actually get rid of all onsite servers entirely, and use the extra room for more important things – like a reindeer exercise area or a hot chocolate Jacuzzi.

Real-Time Naughty/Nice List Updates

Let’s face it: “naughty” and “nice” is relative. But Santa has his requirements. What then happens if someone on the “nice” list does something very naughty after Santa has taken flight – and finds themselves transferred to the “naughty” list? With Cloud computing, Ol’ Saint Nick could simply pull up his master list in the Cloud after arriving at each house, and see the kid’s updated status. With Cloud technology, let’s hope Santa decides to leave Krampus at home!

Immediate Gift Assignment Accuracy Checks

Even with several centuries of experience, even the big guy has to get confused every once in a while about which kid gets which gift. Sometimes they’re color-coordinated, sometimes they’re not. Sometimes they’re labeled, sometimes they’re not. If Santa has eight-thousand different bikes to give in one night, how does he make sure the right one goes to the right kid? Easy. With the Cloud, Santa can simply pull up his inventory list for each house and see exactly who gets what. And just like the naughty/nice list, he can get real-time updates if there are any last minute gift requests. Christmas, meet efficiency!

Certus is Ready to Help Santa (and You) with All Cloud Computing Needs

Certus is proud to offer our services to any and all whom could benefit from our help – regardless of how small (or enormous) the job may be. We hope you have a wonderful holiday season, and would love to talk with you after the holidays about helping you transition to the Cloud.

About The Author

Evan BerkEvan Berk is Managing Partner at Certus Technologies, an IT Managed and Cloud Services firm that specializes in helping clients dramatically improve their business productivity.

Evan is passionate about simplifying and demystifying complex Information Technology systems and believes that the best IT systems should make our lives easier and more productive, both in the workplace and at home. He can be contacted at or at 973-944-5000.

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